hey people i know i havnt been updting in a while but i forget. so yes hi there well since i havnt updated what has been happining is that i havnt really be a good person towords esteban and i admit that. sorry esteban. we broke up. he disurves better. so yes lets see and hmmm i havnt beed so sad as of late i dont really know why. hmm so today is halloween i like halloween. i went to city hall and edgar came. we hung out walked around almost died u know the usual. it was scary we were on the top of the parking lot cuz i wanted to look at the moon which we never found dammit and then we were waliking and we had been joking saying how someone was ganna kill us and then some car came and it was driving crazy and doing curcles and shit i was freaked edgar walked like it was nothing but i know he was frightind. and then we were walking down the stairs and they were looking at us. whao scary. they were dressed in black like the black KKK iono what the hell they were. i jk about the thing. hmm so yea he told me this story about when he was like 5 and his neighbor it was so cute. anyways so yea. dont know what to write anymore. man the day is growing near. less than 2 months! well ill try not to think about it. TRY being the key word and i always end up thinking about it every day. man i need the moon. it relaxis me. i love the moon. i sat outside in the cold friday for 2 hours just looking at it.

 OMG!!!!! IM GOING FUCKING CRAZY!!!! I CANT TAKE IT I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!! well anyways everything just sucks im seriously going insain i cant thik streght im all mixed up i havnt been feeing good man my emotions are so fucked up. im all fucked up!!!! anyways im going to knotts scarey farm tomarrow with luis edgar and this chik named jessica who sounds really nice but i havnt met her. anywho so yea im praying i feel good when i go. today i felt alot better than i have been thank u god. tuesday night is when i came to the conclusion that im going out of my mined cuz i started crying alot and having this unexplainable feeling and i prayed to got out loud crying to him asking him to help me. and i cried myself to sleep. you know what i was thinking.......what doesnt kill u makes u stonger... if thats so true then why am i not strong? anyways today was very unpredictable and would have never been thought of. i would never have thought it would acually happin. if u read this IM SORRY... hmmm lets see o yes in third i didnt really go well i did but not in class everyone left its drama so yea so me and edgar went on the stage and talked. we acually talked.it was really cool. and yea anywho IM SORRY! ok well bye.......

TODAYS EMOTIONS::::::::::::